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Stop Standing in Your Way. | Davey Wavey Fitness

Stop Standing in Your Way.

Right now, I want you to spend 30 seconds thinking of your number one fitness goal.

What would it be? Maybe it’s releasing 20 pounds of body fat. Maybe it’s releasing 200 pounds of body fat. Maybe it’s adding 10 pounds of muscle or maybe it’s building stronger core muscles.

What’s your number one goal?

Write your goal down on a piece of paper. Study it for a few moments. Feel it with every fiber of your being.

What I’m going to tell you next is critically important. Listen to me carefully because this is absolutely huge – and it’s the key to making your goal a reality.

Ready for it?

The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story that you’re telling yourself about why you can’t make it happen. Your story is only true to the extent that you believe it.

The first step is achieving your goal is recognizing that your story is bullshit. Believing otherwise is easy and convenient – and it’s a great excuse for not achieving your goal. But whatever your story is – whether it’s that you’re too old, that you have too many medical issues, that you have no money or anything else – it’s bullshit. While it may be true that you’re older, or that you have medical issues or that you have no money, none of these have anything to do with not achieving the goal that you have written on your piece of paper.

Your story is not serving you. In fact, quite the opposite. It’s time to let it go.

In a life as short as this, no one has time for bullshit – especially bullshit that sabotages us from achieving our dreams. Stop lying to yourself. Recognize that your goal is within reach and that you are capable of extraordinary greatness in all areas of your life.

Today is the day you stop standing in your way.

About Davey Wavey

Davey Wavey is a certified personal trainer and YouTube sensation with more than 250 million video views. For Davey's fitness tips and secrets, sign up for his free monthly newsletter - or download any of his affordable and effective workout programs.


  1. They may sound pathetic, but I can’t motivate myself to do any kind of workout. I don’t want to go to the gym because I’ll get aroused. My best friend who I’m in love with works out at the gym and he invites me to go there every now and then. Every time I tell him no because of two things.

    1. If I see him soaked in sweat after a hard workout I will instantly lose my balance and just drop on my knees because that’s one of the hottest things on earth.
    2. He’s already so pumped. When I get naked next to him I feel like I haven’t lifted a weight in my life.

    I really don’t think that anyone but myself can motivate me to go to gym, but has anyone else every encountered this? If you got over it, how?


    • The gym your friend goes to isn’t the only gym around, let alone the only one open during the times he goes.

      Getting aroused is pretty common (or at least it was when I first started going). I allow myself to get aroused but when it comes to doing a set, I focus on one thing – Finishing the set. Sometimes I use those guys that turn me on as a motivation to push further. Pretty vain in Davey Wavey sense, but it’s what pushes me!

      • Yes I understand, but I sure as hell don’t want to go to the gym alone and I really, really want to go to the gym with him. He knows I’m gay and is okay with it, but I mean.. if we go to the showers and I get aroused it might scare him and that’s what I’m afraid of. I mean.. I might like it, but he sure won’t because he’s straight. I’ve been wondering over and over again if he’s got even a little bit of gayness in him. He hasn’t had his first kiss yet. I’m just wondering if there’s any way to somehow.. alter his fragile state into even a little bit of gayness. Such as hugs. I’ve asked him about giving hugs to other guys, but he said it’s a hard no-no and I don’t get what the big deal is.

        Oh shoot. I’m really going off-topic. Well the bottom line is, I’m scared of the gym.

        • The best way to rid yourself of your fears is to just face them. If you’re scared of going to the gym, either alone or with your crush, is to just go.

          I shit bricks the first time I went there. I was expecting nothing but perfectly buffed people staring down at me like I was some fat pig attempting to lift 5 pnds and sweating over the treadmill. In reality it was nothing like that. People were nice, helpful and the friend that went with me helped me over the edge. He stopped eventually, but I stayed because I had gotten to know the place and the instructors. Things change once you get used to them.

          If you want to go with him, just go. As for the possible arousal, my option would be to just shower at home. Which is what I do. I go around in my gym-clothes (T-shirt and sweatpants) with a vest, coat or sweatshirt added when I go outside to counter the cold. It saves me embarassing shower scenes plus I don’t mind being seen somewhat sweaty.

          And if that option doesn’t work for you, talk to your friend about it. Just tell him what he could possibly expect and if he’s a real friend he’ll understand.

          And if that also isn’t an option, then you should indeed opt for going alone. I used to go with friends but now I always go alone, you get used to it.

        • Oh boy, first off: you have to let go of the idea you might convert him or something. Its not going to happen and pursuing this idea might only ruin your friendship.

          The arousal thing is a much more realistic problem but solveable as such. You might not like it, but talk about it. If you turned down his invitations several times he might already wonder that there is something wrong. Use that as a starting point. Tell him you want to explain why that is.

          I had a similar arousal problem when I started going to the gym with an already very ripped friend. After I depleted my pool of explanations and tactics keeping me from using the shower at the same time, I just had to tell the truth. I told him, that just by looking at his body I get aroused – no matter how much I am aware that he is straight and that there is nothing going to happen EVER. I explained how I was afraid my bodily reaction would give him a wrong idea and make him very uncomfortable and that I lied out of shame about it.

          He was very understanding. Although he seemed a bit estranged the next few times we trained, he got over it and soon started kidding about the whole issue. In a much later and more serious talk about it, he explained to me how my honesty about it helped him to get passed that sometimes weird wall in a homo-hetero friendship. He said he always was a bit on edge when I was around because he wondered in what way I might be attracted to him and that he didn’t know how to deal with it without offending me. He said, and I’ll never forget that: “cause, dude, you know, we heteroes are not that stupid and do realize where your eyes go. So its only the question what they are looking for: a sexual adventure or just something attractive to look at.”

    • Read the article again: your excuse is BULLSHIT.

  2. This* not they. Sorry.

  3. You have no idea how much motivation this just gave me. You’re so right. I give myself excuses all the time, but reading this really got me thinking!! You’re a gift to this world davey wavey!

  4. So many things here.
    1. Don’t rely on someone else to motivate you. Even if you get a workout partner you must be self-motivated. If your partner skips a workout you must STILL go to the gym. Otherwise what do you if your partner just stops going?

    2. Don’t expect drastic changes very quickly. I had a woman ask me some workout advice one time at the gym, she said “I Don’t want to get REALLY big”, getting REALLY big takes YEARS, not hours. You don’t just go in and do a quick workout and tomorrow you’re huge. Measure your progress in weeks and months rather than hours and days.

    3. Don’t be intimidated at the gym. I’m not really impressed by people lifting a ton of weight. When you are working out, you are only trying to compete against yourself, in other words, you want to progress slowly. I’m more impressed with the people that I see in there on a regular basis, I don’t care if they can bench press 400 pounds or only 50 pounds, if you’re challenging yourself that’s all that matters.

    4. If you’re new to the gym, don’t be afraid to ask questions of the staff or other gym members. Most are friendly even if they look very intense, they’re only intense about their workout and most love talking about it and remember what it’s like starting out and not knowing anything.

    5. For poor Oliver above, I have 2 bits of advice. First, try jerking off right before you go to the gym, it could help not getting so worked up when you go. And second, I know this is harsh, but grow up, put on your big boy pants and join the rest of the gay men in the real gay world. You’re living in a fantasy world, forget the straight boy and focus your attention on guys you actually have a chance with. And when you’re at the gym, try to focus on your workout routine, rather than the men. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t check out guys at the gym, I think everyone does (well straight guys check out girls) but you really need to bring yourself back to your workout. It’s a gym, not a gay nightclub.

  5. Well said Davey, Now it’s time to take action. Thanks

  6. Davey, this is probably my favorite article you have posted this year. Great advice in it, something that so many people have trouble with.

    I started going to the gym regularly about a year ago. At first I was just jogging on the treadmill, and when I got used to going to the gym 4-5 days a week I tried to add in weights, but I was clueless. So I waited until I was home for winter break and hired a personal trainer for 4 sessions. Even those few times were enough for me to get comfortable in the weight area.

    Then going back after the spring, it was nice to say hi to Mike and James, and feel welcome in the gym.

  7. im not standing in my own way or anyone elses.. the only people in my way are the ass-hats at the gym who go there to sit on the equipment and play on grindr.. or endlessly text their friends that they are at the gym.. and update their FB status every few secs when they see a hot guy walk by.. GO THE FUCK HOME! stand in your own way somewhere away from me… jeeez….
    /end rant

  8. christopher says:

    need to lose last 20.time to switch things up-and go for it.