Lose Weight: Love the Unlovable You.

Today’s guest post is by my good friend and spiritual weight release coach, Diane Petrella. Diane is also one of the contributors to The Davey Wavey Weight Loss Program.

Do you ever wish that you could love your body completely? Even if it seems difficult, you can learn to do this. Loving what already feels good about your body inspires you. But loving what seems unlovable transforms you.

Love Releases Hate

When you want to lose weight but “hate” yourself and your “fat” body, it’s difficult to focus on having the body you really want. This is because the energy of hate emotionally binds you to your excess weight with a power stronger than steel. The more you hold disrespectful thoughts of your body, the more you stay stuck. Any progress you do make is potentially short-lived.

For example, in any hate-filled relationship, hate actually binds people together. Have you ever known some divorced couples so filled with venom that they continue to harbor resentment and anger for years? They can’t move on because their hatred keeps them emotionally tied to their former partner. But love allows release. Leaving a relationship with love liberates you to let go and create a more loving relationship with someone else.

And so it is with your body. Releasing weight from a body that you love and accept inspires you to focus on the thinner you just waiting to emerge.

Free Yourself

Learning to love your body isn’t just a “nice” idea. It’s vital to your health and happiness. Loving eyes see beyond the superficial. With all its excess weight and loose muscle and belly fat, loving your body completely inspires you to do what your body needs to be healthy and fit. As you embrace your body as the amazing gift it is, despite carrying excess weight, you’re naturally drawn towards nutritious foods and invigorating movement that is good for your body.

A Loving Affirmation

If you’ve never loved your body it may seem impossible to think your feelings will ever change. But feelings do change. Simply having the desire to love your body, and a willingness to change your beliefs, is a first step.

Love inspired thoughts create love directed action. Commit to sending your body daily loving thoughts with this powerful affirmation:

Even though my body carries excess weight, I totally and completely love and accept myself.

To deepen your experience of using this affirmation, connect with your heart energy. Get yourself in a comfortable position in a quiet place. Close your eyes. Place your hand over your heart and feel it beating. Keeping your hand on your heart, repeat the above phrase to yourself or out loud several times.

Saying this affirmation may initially seem strange and the words may not feel true. That’s OK. I invite you to do this anyway because over time it will help you soften your attitude towards your body. When practiced daily and with earnest intent, what seems unlovable becomes loved. And what now seems impossible becomes possible.

Have you learned to love your body? Let us know in the comments below.

About DianePetrella

Diane Petrella, MSW is a psychotherapist and life coach. She offers her clients a spiritual approach to weight release and helps them develop a loving, respectful relationship with their bodies. Receive a free copy of Diane’s Seven Easy & Effortless Weight Loss Secrets by signing up for her monthly e-newsletter, Living Lightly, for spiritual insights and tips to release weight with confidence and love. To contact Diane visit www.dianepetrella.com.


  1. Hello Davey, now that i read this i want to tell you because thanks to you (and many other inspirational things) im on a diet and im loosing weight! i already lost 55pounds! 🙂 i started december 1st and now 3 month later im so much happy and active and i realise when i read your blog that you really have to love yourself and your body otherwise its imposible! anyhow this was only a thanks… (btw if you are a gay guy who whants to loose weight i’ve seen coyote ugly for the first time in years and after i see the streptease i decided i want to loose weight and still watch it everytime i want to eat junkfood :D)

  2. I totally agree that loving your body is essential to a joy-filled life. However, an affirmation that begins “Even though my body carries excess weight” is not an affirmation of self-love. How about “Because my body is filled with stored energy, I love and celebrate the body I have.” I have no excess weight. I have exactly the right weight for me and my body today, in this moment. When the body-fascists try to talk about self-acceptance, they always get it wrong because they really don’t believe that every body shape is beautiful.

    • There is such a thing as being overweight, and it is delusional to try and pretend that every person on earth has the perfect weight for them. Every body is capable of being beautiful, and we can all accept one another, but that does not mean that we should ignore that there is such a thing as an actual “healthy weight.”

    • Steve, I totally agree! Another possibility might be “Because my body is smart and resilient, it adapts to even the most broken food system in ways that meet my needs and maximize my ability to survive…”

  3. I agree with Diane. I know from my own experiences that I have tendencies were I hate how I am. When I get into that mindset, I can’t focus on eating healthy, or exercise. I get in a “why should I care” mood, and I pretty much sabotage myself. I am not happy with my weight, I gained weight years ago during a pregnancy and haven’t lost it but added to it a bit. I have been trying to be good with diet and exercise, I eat fairly healthy anyways. But like Diane said, when I get to the point that I hate my body I lose sight of it all, and have to go back 3 steps. One of these days I will learn to fully love myself. Until then my weight will be a struggle for me.

  4. Hey Davey, I am just happy you affirm and continue to affirm loving not just the person, but the body the person has. I am on my way to doing that and more. Thank you !!!

  5. Hi, you are so right. i have lost about 15 kg. and i couldn’t do it without the right mindset. Have a great day and keep up the good work.

  6. Hi Everyone!

    Thank you all for your comments. I hope you found this article helpful.

    I’d like to clarify the meaning behind the affirmation I use here. There is no judgement about carrying excess weight. “Excess” weight refers to weight that is compromising someone’s physical or emotional well-being and what that means is different for each person. When someone has the desire to release excess weight from their body it is important to release it with love rather than self-hatred. That is the spirit behind such an affirmation. Whatever words one chooses is less important than embracing the essence of this article: To see yourself and your body through the eyes of love.

    I wish you all well on your journey.


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