Gay Men & Aging: A Different Approach!

HIV-and-aging-717445-300x155On my 26th birthday, people around me started reminding me that I’m in my late 20s. Apparently, this is a bad thing. Because then you’re 30, and then 40 and then 50 and so on. It’s basically, “Happy 26th Birthday. You’re dead.”

I know that a lot of us (and gay men, in particular) fear getting old. In a society and culture that worships youth and wrinkle-free skin, the inevitable effects of aging can challenge us and make us feel less desirable. Sometimes even invisible.

But I think we have it all wrong. Growing old isn’t a disease to be fought. It’s not a plague or a poison.

On the contrary, growing old is a gift. And it’s a gift that too many people in our community haven’t been able to experience. I think back to the AIDS epidemic of the 80s and 90s, and how many gay men lost their battles so early in life. I think about the fact that gay, lesbian and bisexual youth are 4x more likely to attempt suicide and that nearly 50% of transgender people have seriously complemented suicide.

In this way, growing old is something to honor and celebrate. Sure, we might get grey hairs and saggy tits, but we’re here goddamn it.

Of course, this isn’t an excuse to stop taking care of ourselves. On the contrary, staying healthy and active helps keep these bodies in working condition. As we age, let’s do so with energy, good health and minimized risk for chronic disease and ailments. Let’s make sure we get the most out of our years.

Anyway, here’s to becoming a bunch of old farts.

About Davey Wavey

Davey Wavey is a certified personal trainer and YouTube sensation with more than 250 million video views. For Davey's fitness tips and secrets, sign up for his free monthly newsletter - or download any of his affordable and effective workout programs.


  1. Yeah, tell it (aging a gift) to all the OTHER gay men out there who want nothing to do with us after we’re 35.

  2. Davey, I’m 61 and have I can confirm that you are right. It is all fun and it just gets better, really. Don’t worry about getting old.

    • And yes, I still got laid by beautiful guys long after my 20s. 😉

    • Your’s is a point of view where real intgllieence shines through.

    • Looks beautiful to me too! Do you use that bench much? It looks fantastic there — benches are near the top of my list for this year.“There have been more than usual bugs and ‘pestie’ things around…”Um, photos?

    • Ik steun jullie initiatief om met de gemeente te overleggen of er een betere locatie gevonden kan worden. Met beter bedoel ik dan vooral veiliger. Want dit is absoluut geen veilige locatie aangezien er regelmatig met hoge snelheden over de Oude Doetinchemseweg wordt gereden. Dit vraagt om problemen!

  3. Men don’t start looking hot until they’re way passed their 20s…there’s something about their confidence and how they hold themselves that is so much more than just a set of 5% body fat ravioli abs….well, that, and they’re much more interesting to sit down and talk with =p

  4. Hi, Davey,
    Deepgeek, your resident straight-guy lurker, who came primarily for your fitness material here. Wanted to say that my late forties marked my life becoming even more sexual and loving and romantic, and thanks to lifting and jogging, I’m like that famous book “Picture of Dorian Grey,” I’m looking younger as I get older!
    Best Regards,