Help: I Get Hard In The Gym Shower!

Dear Davey,

I need your help with something really embarrassing. Because of my work schedule, I need to shower at the gym. My gym has one big open shower for all the men to use. The problem is, I often get hard taking a shower even if I’m not attracted to the other guys. I don’t know what to do!



men94showerHey Luke,

Thank you for the very honest question.

Much like you, I have a penis. And also like you, that penis sometimes gets hard. The reasons for this vary, but it’s a pretty long list and it sometimes happens during inopportune moments. And yes, it’s definitely happened in a communal shower.

It’s interesting that the simple act of getting a boner can elicit such embarrassing and shameful feelings. Especially when getting a boner is often involuntary and a very standard part of the male experience. I sleep. I breathe. I eat. I shit. And sometimes I get hard. When you strip away the layers of guilt, there’s nothing really notable about a boner.

You’re not the first guy to get hard in a shower and you’re not the last. Because most of the people in the communal shower will likely have a functioning penis, they’ll probably understand your predicament. If not, that’s their issue and not yours; don’t take on their baggage.

When it comes to sexual orientation, I’m not sure how you identify. But being a gay man (like myself) in a communal shower with a raging boner adds another layer to the situation. But the truth is, boners don’t imply sexual attraction. Sometimes, they just happen. And even if you are sexually attracted to the other guys in the shower, most would probably be flattered. If they’re not flattered, hopefully they realize that boners aren’t dangerous - and that they’d probably be doing the exact same thing if women were around.

The bottom line is this: Boners just aren’t a big deal. No pun intended.


P.S. Of course, you can always avoid the shower altogether by working out at home with Davey Wavey’s Bootcamp Workout! It includes three instructional videos that you can use without any gym equipment!

About Davey Wavey

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  1. Sal Piscioneri says:

    It happens to me all the time., I usually get starred at and sometimes some butt holes will say Your not my type buddy. I use a towel as quickly as I can to cover but sometimes putting on my undies it flops in my shorts until totally concealed. I soften up quick once my boys are covered.
    I used to work out with buddies but it got way to embarrassing, everyone thought I wanted their bodies and that is totally another issue.
    I go most times at odd hours when the gym is less crowded or in use.
    Thanks an d love to all:>)

  2. It might help to jerk off in privacy before going to the shower (if need be, in the toilet of the gym).

  3. Change the gym to a one that has curtains in showers…

  4. It may help to flex your thighs, as the blood gets pulled to your legs instead of your penis.

    *This may not work if you already have a raging boner.

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  5. I use to worry in the communal showers in basic training. I would just try to think about anything but the guys in the shower. Like work, heavy equipment, machinery, etc. It worked for me. The feer helped as well because this was before Don’t ask don’t tell.

  6. I played lots of sports in high-school (soccer, wrestling, track) and I swear half the guys had some wood going on in the shower. It’s a function of age.

    depending upon the gym you go to, an erection in the shower can be an asset;) the first time i went to the Muscle System on Market in the Castro, the gang shower was a boner-bump!

    be proud of your boner! Use the Force, Luke!

  7. Dear. Davey

    there is a problem that I have when I was 7 I was rapped by someone I thought was my friend and then when I was 16 he did it to me again and it has me confused for if im gay bi or what please help